This is a tale, but it isn’t made up. This happened in real life.
It was the summer of 2018. My brother, Daniel, was living with my wife and me, here in Nowata, Oklahoma. I pastored two small United Methodist churches here, and there was a deep need to get to know the neighborhood in which we lived. Meanwhile, Daniel was getting ready to go into ministry. We arranged for a ministry in which he would go door to door in the neighborhood to try to get to know people and build bridges into the church for those whom Christ might be calling.
Several days a week, Daniel would partner with volunteers from the church to go up and down the streets of Nowata. We had a shared map that we would update about who lived in each house, if they belonged to other local churches, how receptive they were to us, and whether or not follow-up might be wise. It was a good ministry that eventually brought in an older man, humble in spirit, to repent of a life of sin before unexpectedly dying. It also led to my now-friend Johnny showing up a couple years later to worship with, and eventually join, the church. It bore fruit. Someday I hope to resurrect such an effort and bear much more fruit!
The reason ministries like that are not more common is because there are many very disturbed people in the world. One has no idea how many there are until one starts literally going door to door. Many live with addiction. Many are hoarders. Many get by on government checks and have very little exposure to people. Of these, many are very awkward and uncomfortable. Some of these are quite hostile.
One day, Daniel was out with Joseph, his wingman, and the two came to the house of a woman not more than a quarter of a mile from the church building. She was angry from the moment she answered the door. “I have seen you two going from house to house up and down this street! Completely inappropriate! People might have a good mind to shoot at you two.” Daniel and Joe gently explained they’re just trying to get to know the neighborhood, but that they could see she didn’t want to be known and would be on their way. She yelled at them as they turned and left. Both were understandably discouraged by this.
I have a tirade I got on sometimes, in which I get pretty animated about how people in this country used to be neighborly and hospitable. I genuinely mourn the tearing of our social fabric that has turned strangers on our doorsteps from welcome friends to suspected enemies. There are myriad causes for this beyond the scope of this article. Maybe a future writing is in order.
I knew who this lady was. I remembered having seen her outside of her house at one time. She came to a free breakfast hosted by the Delaware church earlier in the year. She sat with a local man who is known to be bitter and imbalanced. I spoke with the two of them for a bit. There was a lot of anger in their speech, so I eventually moved along. I wasn’t surprised to hear that she had been so unhinged with two young men coming to her door. I was sad, though.
Daniel and Joseph are both quite handsome. They are polite and eager to make friends. One has to be pretty twisted to take either of them, or both of them together, as unwelcome guests. Even if one were opposed to God and his people, just from a worldly standpoint, most should be eager to speak with men of their caliber.
Near the end of the summer, it came time for Daniel to leave. His position with the church was only ever an internship, aimed at mutual benefit. His time with us had indeed been mutually beneficial. The church was glad to host a party in the back yard of the parsonage to bid him a fond farewell. Over forty folks turned out for the event, which is pretty big for our little church, speaking to the affection they had for him. It was a lovely time.
Halfway through the event, I turn my head to see this lady, the mean lady who had chased Daniel and Joseph away from her house, in my back yard. She looked insecure and defensive. It turns out she had been out on a walk with her two grandsons, they had been walking down the alley by my house, and the kids decided to invite themselves in. She had followed. I instantly knew who she was.
“Welcome!” I said, “I remember meeting you a while back at the Delaware church. My brother came to your door with another friend of the church just a few weeks ago. You were quite rude to them, as I recall.”
Before she could answer, Daniel was standing with us, smiling as big has his face could manage. “Welcome,” he said, “You are very welcome here. Can I grab some food for you?” Not a mention of her ill treatment of him. No barbs or passive-aggressive comments. Daniel was relishing his opportunity to bless someone who had cursed him.
The strangeness of this event could not have been anything but a God event. Daniel had gone to perhaps 100 doorsteps during his summer with us. Of those, a few were mean, but none so unhinged as this woman. We had only had one party like this. What are the odds that this antisocial woman would invite herself to the one party we hosted? You cannot convince me that this was some statistical fluke. This was arranged by God for his glory. The Lord was glorified by a believer blessing one who had cursed him.
Daniel could have been selfish, petty, or cruel. He could have welcomed her only after giving her a piece of his mind. He could have rejoiced in turning her away as she had turned him away. He could have passive-aggressively said that he would be happy to visit with her some other time, but for now he and his friends needed to have a private party. He did none of those things. He welcomed her to come celebrate with him.
She briefly thanked us for the invitation but said they must be on their way. She hurriedly gathered her grandkids up and disappeared. I have not seen her since.
I often wonder if that was the last chapter of the story of that lady and my church. The story could be complete. God has already been glorified. No additional chapters are needed. But sometimes I wonder if someday she will appear again with a contrite heart, needing to hear the good news and repent of her sins. On that day, she will be most welcome.
For his part, Daniel is now a pastor at two other rural Oklahoma churches. Both of us now serve in the Global Methodist denomination. He continues to turn the other cheek when others wrong him. The Lord continues to be glorified in his life, and in the lives of all who live according to the Spirit rather than the flesh.
““You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
- Matthew 5:43-48
There are many people who are scared by accounts like this into never boldly sharing the good news of Jesus Christ. If that is what you take away from this article, you have missed the point. God providentially made a way to bear fruit even in the roughest of terrain. When new souls are won, there is a celebration in heaven. When enemies persecute us, the Lord is glorified. The only scenario in which the Lord is not glorified is when we remain silent about the best news the world could ever hear.
The world is going to hate us because it hated Jesus first. He told us as much. But if we fear men more than God, such that we actually stop our lips from proclaiming the risen Lord, then I believe we gamble with our own souls. Trust in the Lord and lean not on your own understanding. If you speak the truth in love, trusting in God’s providence, he will work through you to bring him glory. It might be awkward, uncomfortable, or even scary, but more than all those things, it will be holy.
I love this story. It is so much an example of the Christian life and how we are called to do the thing that is against human nature. It is not natural to forgive, to turn the other cheek, to go the extra mile. We have to be obedient. Sadly, the inability to forgive is rampant. Father and son are not speaking because one will not apologize. We are called to love without the apology being offered. Son stops talking to his mother for no apparent reason. Overtures for reconciliation fall on deaf ears. Brother and sister don't talk because of an inheritance issue. One tries to fix the problem, the other pridefully ignores what is offered. These are all true stories of people I know.
What a wonderful thing your church has done, to reach out to each person and family in your town. We need to be welcoming to EVERYONE. It's Christ's way. Thank you for this article. Blessings !!
I once had a good Christian coworker from Ethiopia. He shared with me that he would never forgive a certain relative for something done. I gently reminded him as Christians we are commanded to forgive. I will never know if he ever forgave this person until we all meet again in the hereafter. Christians must remember Christ's teachings. For me, they are food for a starving soul.
While in Michigan, I was verbally attacked and threatened by a large man in his 40s because my dog was barking nonstop while my husband and I were having breakfast at a restaurant. I attempted to explain my dog suffers from "separation anxiety" so severe the veterinarian prescribed medication. He wouldn't hear a word. I just stood there and took the tirade without saying another word. He accused me of abusing my dog and said he wanted to call the police. I later found out, some friends of mine knew him from the church they attend. Would you say he is a good witness for his church?